We live in a time where right or wrong is constantly debated. When Anthony Weiner scandal broke, debates on Facebook and Twitter ensued regarding weather it was right or wrong to Facebook or tweet people of the opposite sex if you are married. The proper question should have been “is it wise to Facebook or tweet people of the opposite sex if you are married?
Merriam-Webster Dictionary has several definitions for wisdom and here are the definitions I want to focus on…
1. the ability to discern inner qualities and relationships: insights
2. good sense: judgement
I have a bad habit of turning on the TV while I clean and do other chores at home. With today being a holiday I overheard and watched many of the “judge shows.” Judge Alex, Divorce Court and Judge Judy were a few of them. These judges and shows are full of people who used poor judgement and demand to be made “right” by a judge.
- A young woman suing a hotel manager because the hotel didn’t provide her with a refrigerator and microwave in her room and therefore she had to order hundreds of dollars of food that wasn’t good for her.
- A husband and wife on the verge of divorce yet the husband didn’t see anything “wrong” with his Facebook flirtations and getting other women he’s meeting there to give him money
What is it about the human psyche that seeks to have decisions simplified to right or wrong? It deflects the responsibility onto the one who decides the rightness or wrongness. If the young woman who was suing the hotel won the case, the hotel and judge would be the reason she has weight issues. If the judge said that the husband’s Facebook activities were right, then when his wife left it would have been her inability to accept his rightness. In both situations, the young woman and husband, failed to make good decisions based on their goals, values or
I’ve heard several times that Billy Graham made a decision early in life to never be alone with a woman other than his wife. He does this even if he’s riding an elevator alone and woman enters he leaves to not only avoid temptation but to avoid giving anyone an opportunity for an accusation.
There are absolutes in life and there is right & wrong. But as we mature into adults, the majority of decisions we make have more to do with “is it right for me?” or “is it right for the situation and the people involved?” What is the wise course of action based on where you want to go and your current circumstance?
Wisdom guided by your values and priorities leads to a intentional life without regrets.